And yea, she arose from the grave, shambled to the kitchen and fried some eggs.

It has been close to a year since I made a post on here. Pathetic, I know.

So far, I have passed my 3rd semester of nursing school and things are looking very likely that I will pass my 4th semester of nursing school and get my ASN degree. Depending on how well my exit exam goes, I plan on taking my NCLEX-RN exam sometime in July. If all goes well, I will be an RN by August. Yay! Now I just have find a job... not so easy in this market, but I have hope I can find at least a part time gig as an RN. I want the experience. Not to mention these student loans I need to pay off... And being able to work nights would be a HUGE bonus for me, I'm nocturnal by nature.

How have I been feeling since my last post? In a word: crappy. I've been sick alot and my asthma has been acting up something fierce. I've gone from using my inhaler MAYBE once a week to almost daily. It's been taking me longer to recover from things like the common cold. I've had to keep my inhaler in my pocket during my clinical hours for school. And I've needed it, too. =(

Be that as it may, I still think that the future is looking pretty good for me. I'll just have to fight harder than I had planned on fighting to make things go the way I hope they go for me. I've made it this far, I know I can make it all the way. I just didn't know that something I'd be fighting is my own health. I've been so tired and weak lately and I have literally have not had the time to go to the clinic to get checked out. Every minute of every day has something scheduled for me from now until I pass my state boards. Yes, I know that's not a healthy way to be. BUT, I have to do that to myself to get things done when I'm in my phase of feeling negative or stressed out. And baby, I have seen more stress than a toilet seat has seen butts!!

I've been questioning myself alot thanks to someone being a... less than upfront person... to me. However, one person does NOT have the power to change my plans for my future, and I won't give them the satisfaction of chasing me away from my chosen career path. Only the law can do that, so neener neener neener!! (Yes, I'm channeling my inner 2nd grader.) It just complicates my job search, that's all. And made me rule out a category of nursing to work in. Better I find out about that now as a student than as a licensed professional, right?

In short: I have been an angst factory for the past few months. Some of it has been all in my head, and some of it has been things I can't control. Yes, I've gone to counseling. It's been helping a little bit.

I should probably hook up with the school's career center. I know I need some work on making resumes and my interviewing skills. For all I know, I may have the interviewing skills of a troll, so some feedback from someone who knows what they are doing would be VERY helpful.

Well, I should get back to sleep so I'm not a zombie at clinicals. I'll see you when I see you!

The day I followed the Circulating Nurse in the M/S unit!

So, on to a bit of real life. Today, I got to do my observation day in the Operation/Med-Surg. unit. I was so excited that I didn't sleep much of the night. I got to the hospital around 7am. I wandered around a bit, because I was lost. (Perhaps fortunately for me, I've only ever been to the hospital for being born, and for the yearly blood work to check my thyroid hormone levels. I pretty much only know where the Labs and bathrooms are at in this hospital.) Eventually, I found someone who works in that unit and she showed me around. Then I changed into some surgical scrubs. I was quite shocked that they carried scrubs big enough even for someone as fat as I am! They looked pretty good, too.

After finding a few patients who agreed to let me watch their procedures, and having them sign the consent forms (so I could watch), I got to see several things for the first time. I saw 2 colonoscopies, 1 endoscopy and 1 gallbladder removal. I can't give any details about the patients, due to the HIPPA privacy clause. I hope y'all understand.

At first, I was kinda squeamish during the colonoscopies (I mean, after all, they are sticking a camera up someone's bum! Ick!) but it got better. I got to see what a phyllop looked like in someone's colon. I got to see what diverticulitis looked like. They had a hell of a time with the endoscopy, the patient had a hair trigger gag reflex. (They stick the fiber optic camera tube down your throat for that one.) I got to see what vocal cords look like in real life.

I have to say, that in my opinion, the gallbladder removal surgery was the most interesting and the coolest! I watched the team prep the room, prep the patient, and even watched most of the surgery. Wow! They did all of that with just one small incision! I think it's called a laproscopy. The surgeon was using these really long instruments to perform the procedure. I would have stayed to watch the whole thing, but my time was up and I was getting light headed from hunger.

After a bit of being lost and wandering, I found the cafeteria. The food was actually pretty good. Nothing like the slop they feed you in public school. Amazingly enough, I managed to wolf down my food without feeling the least bit queasy after watching the surgery. Heh. Now if I could just pull that trick off for my fear of needles. I do okay if I am the one GIVING the injection, but I still freeze up in terror if I'm the one GETTING the injection. Quite embarassing.

I'm still not sure what department I want to work in after I get my licence. But Med-Surg seems pretty interesting. I've still got a whole nother year (and passing my state boards) to go before I need to make up my mind.